War on Cheese

One week later, Flippy still will not explain to us the reason for his War on Cheese. Last night, he sat in his room for two hours, poking a piece of cheese with a stick and asking it questions. After those two hours, he emerged and handed us the cheese saying, "Either it won't talk, or it knows nothing." We reminded him that cheese does not talk and he said, "Well, that was a waste of two hours, then, wasn't it?" Flippy has continued to order all cheese that is found be rounded up and has ordered the dairy makers that they should put a halt to making cheese. It is still unclear the reasons for Flippy's actions, but we hope he shall reveal his motives in time.

The Warlord Liam Hawk, Defender of Flippyville, Chief Steward of Lord Flippy Johansen III, The Slayer of Beasts.

Cheese

Yesterday evening, Lord Flippy Johansen III, The Slayer of Beasts, stood up on his balcony and declared, "CHEESE FOR EVERYONE!!!" This morning, Flippy returned to the balcony and this time declared, "CHEESE FOR NO ONE!!!" Flippy then proceeded to declare war on cheese! Flippy now has the town guard searching the town and rounding up all of the cheese. Flippy refuses to discuss the reasons for this "War on Cheese." Instead, each time he is asked about it, he simply answers, "You will understand in time." More on this to come.

The Warlord Liam Hawk, Defender of Flippyville, Chief Steward of Lord Flippy Johansen III, The Slayer of Beasts.

Flippy Crisis: Solution

Today, after over a week of odd behavior, five injured guards, and three impromptu one man interpretations of famous musicals, Flippy has emerged from the cave. His behavior has completely changed and he has shown no signs of remembering the events of the past week. The town psychiatrist has attempted to explain this, and can only come to the conclusion that Flippy had a complete mental breakdown. Flippy has since returned to normal and he is perfectly fine.

Sincerely,

The Warlord Liam Hawk, Defender of Flippyville, Chief Steward of Lord Flippy Johansen III, The Slayer of Beasts.

Flippy Crisis: Day 3

Yesterday was mostly eventless. Flippy remained in the cave and refused to come out for any reason. Last night while we slept, Flippy emerged from the cave. He entered the town and stole everybody's socks! We awoke this morning to find that he had taken all of our socks and when we arrived at the cave, Flippy was weaving our socks into a gigantic sock ball! We've tried to get him to return our socks, but every time a guard approached, he would hit them with a melon. Now, not only is Flippy refusing to come out of the cage, but he has all of our socks in there with him.

Once again, I will continue to update on the situation until such time that it is resolved and Flippy comes out of his cave. I have to go now because he's apparently decided throwing coconuts is a good idea and I think he's liable to hurt somebody.

Sincerely,

The Warlord Liam Hawk, Defender of Flippyville, Chief Steward of Lord Flippy Johansen III, The Slayer of Beasts.

Flippy has flipped...

It is official, Lord Flippy Johansen, III, The Slayer of Beasts has lost his mind. This morning when I entered his suite to awaken him, Flippy was gone. After some searching, I found that he had climbed out the window, stole the blacksmith's pants and holed up in a cave. We have tried to get him to come out of the cave, but when he came out (walking on his hands no less), he was only out long enough to kick one of the guards and scurry back into the cave. Now, I'm sitting outside the cave, watching him eat the blacksmith's pants.

I will update on the situation once we know more about why Flippy is acting this way. Until then, I need to help the guards, because every time they get close, Flippy kicks them.

Sincerely,

The Warlord Liam Hawk, Defender of Flippyville, Chief Steward of Lord Flippy Johansen III, The Slayer of Beasts.

Black Sails

Black Sails in Flippyville Harbor! That's what we saw just two weeks before the Flippyville Guitar Hero Tournament was set to begin. In our land, black sails are a sure sign that the ship belongs to pirates. And because of this we knew something must be done.

We set out to meet with those in the ships and found that they intended to block our harbor unless we turned over to them all of our gold. Upon hearing this, Lord Flippy Johansen III, The Slayer of Beasts, slapped the captain of the pirate ship with his fish, and we returned to shore. As we prepared to do battle with the pirates, Flippy jumped into the water and swam at the pirate ship. Upon reaching the ship, he began to headbutt it. Flippy then returned to shore and ordered an attack.

We advanced upon the ships, and the lead ship (the one Flippy had headbutted) suddenly began to sink. As the pirates fled to other ships, we quickly surrounded them and prepared for battle. The captain of the first pirate ship dropped his sword and surrendered. The other pirates soon followed suit as they saw Flippy was now swimming for their ships.

After a brief discussion, the pirates were sent on their way, promising never to return. Having proved victorious in this situation, we all cheered Flippy as we made our way back to the square to begin preparations for the Flippyville Guitar Hero Tournament.

Guitar Hero

Yes, folks, there is Guitar Hero in Flippyville, and we have just completed the 5th annual Guitar Hero Tournament. Since the first tournament in 2006, citizens of Flippyville and the surrounding country side have gathered to place their names in the Flippyville Guitar Hero Tournament. Once all the names are in, their names are placed in brackets, and the tournament begins. The winner of this years tournament was Lord Flippy Johansen III, The Slayer of Beasts, himself. This marks Flippy's 3rd consecutive victory in the tournament. The runner up was Igor Thermobald, who himself won the first Guitar Hero Tournament in 2006. Igor looked to be doing very well in this years tournament, until he accidentally broke the Whammy Bar off his controller. The loss of his Whammy Bar cost him dearly, securing Flippy's tournament victory.

Other interesting things have been happening in Flippyville, and I will blog about them in the coming days and weeks.

Sincerely,

The Warlord Liam Hawk, Defender of Flippyville, Chief Steward of Lord Flippy Johansen III, The Slayer of Beasts.

It's been a busy few weeks in Flippyville! Very soon I will give an update on those events that have occurred since my last post. There have been a lot of things happening here in Flippyville and I'll gladly tell about all of them when I have more time to write.

Sincerely,

The Warlord Liam Hawk, Defender of Flippyville, Chief Steward of Lord Flippy Johansen III, The Slayer of Beasts.

Flippyville

Welcome to the blog of Flippyville. We are a modest village ruled over by Lord Flippy Johansen III, The Slayer of Beasts. This blog will tell the stories of our village and our daily experiences.

First I should introduce myself. I am The Warlord Liam Hawk, Defender of Flippyville, Chief Steward of Lord Flippy Johansen III, The Slayer of Beasts.

Now, to begin this blog, allow me to explain how Lord Flippy Johansen III became known as The Slayer of Beasts. It began two weeks ago as our village was attacked by a beast that came to be called the Dust Bunny of Epic Proportions. This beast stood sixteen feet in height and threatened the safety of our entire village. Flippy set out and faced the beast in battle. With a torch, Flippy struck the Dust Bunny and it burst into flame. The Dust Bunny fled toward the river, but Flippy gave chase and caught the beast by the tail. With a swift blow, Flippy slew the Dust Bunny of Epic Proportions and rolled its burning carcass into the river.

The next day, the shepherds came running to the village. They told us that they had been chased from the Silver Glade by a great Black Monkey that had taken control of the land. Flippy, along with myself, set out to face this Black Monkey of the Silver Glade. Upon arriving at the Glade, we found the Black Monkey, violently swinging the branch of a tree. Flippy first drew out a banana and threw it at the Black Monkey. The Black Monkey leapt for the banana, but upon seeing Flippy, turned and charged in our direction. Flippy pulled a fish from his satchel and struck the Black Monkey with it. The Black Monkey backed away, but then again tried to strike Flippy. This time Flippy moved and the Black Monkey leapt upon my face. I pulled the Black Monkey from my face and threw it across the Glade. Flippy then leapt upon the Black Monkey again striking it with his fish, and slaying the beast.

As a result of his actions in slaying the Dust Bunny of Epic Proportions and the Black Monkey of the Silver Glade, Flippy was granted the new title of "Slayer of Beasts." Our great village of Flippyville feasted in celebration of the actions of our leader, Lord Flippy Johansen III, The Slayer of Beasts.